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Wha? That’s me!! – I’m Definitely a ‘Big Girl in a Skinny World’

Very excited to hear about the new You Tube series from the good people behind Big Girl in a Skinny World from Marie Claire. It certainly sounds promising…I only hope they show a few more ‘Big Girl’ style icons in future episodes. I’ll be keeping my eye open for sure.

I certainly enjoyed Episode 1. Can’t wait to see the rest!

UK Fashion, I <3 You!

Seriously, this Fashion Therapy article from Liz Jones really highlights the plight of plus-size fashionistas.

As seen on Adele – the dresses that may be the answer to every curvy girl’s prayers

We really don’t suffer lightly when it comes to poor fit and quality so it’s amazing to see some fantastic new fashions hitting the runways these days. I just wish the Canadian fashion industry would jump on the band wagon and give some of us curvy gals some gorgeous glad rags made right here in The Great White North!

Fotoshop by Adobe

Saw this video and had to share – too funny! Society’s standards of beauty continue to amaze me. This just shows how ridiculous they are:

Time of the (Party) Season

Kiyonna plus size dressWell, party season is indeed around the corner. I do love this time of year. When all the girls get their glitz on and the guys get gorgeous. But as a larger lady I do also have a tough time finding something suitably fabulous to get me party-perfect.

I tend to end up with a slinky little black dress or something equally monochrome and style it up with some fierce jewelry. Lucky for me, this year the jewelry will be the easy part. As of this past weekend, I am an Independent Stylist for Stella & Dot. I’m so excited for this new venture! My official launch party is November 25th so if you’re in the Ottawa area, send me an email for an invite to my little soiree. The more the merrier!

I’ll be wearing this sexy little number from Kiyonna Klothing and the Nolita necklace from Stella & Dot’s Fall 2010 collection.

Stella & Dot also have a great selection of bracelets in multiple and adjustable sizes so you never have to squeeze your hand through a too-small opening. A fierce fashion find!

Stella & Dot Nolita NecklaceIn other news, I’m booked for my fourth fill for next Wednesday. I’m a little nervous about this one since I’m not so sure I really NEED the fill. I WANT another fill because I’m just a tad too comfortable with the restriction I’ve got and I don’t think I’ve quite hit my ‘sweet spot’. I think my lap-band was just a bit tighter, the pounds might fall off just a little faster…

See, I’ve managed to learn the tricks of the trade with my current tightness and have found a way to eat the stuff I really shouldn’t. I’m still losing but I’m only slowing myself down. But I’m not doing myself any favours. So, I’m going to use the tools at my disposal tighten up the cable tie wrapped around my belly.

There’s never a good time for a fill. There’s always an event around the corner. So, I’m just gonna get ‘er done. Watch this space…I may just post a progress pic.

In Those Jeans or How Ottawa Plus-Size Shopping Sucks

Got a phone call from Jody at Slimband yesterday to arrange my ‘next appointment’. I’ve had some food and fill related chats but other than that, it’s the first time I’ve heard from them regarding healing and surgical followup since Day 5 post-op. Haven’t had a chance to ring them back yet but suspect it’s going to be a 3-month followup appointment at their offices in TO.

bluesfestNormally I’d be super excited at the thought of returning to Slimband’s clinic and spending some fun time in TO but I’m more than a little busy in the next couple of weeks what with potential job ops (YAY!) and family fun time.

To top it all off, it’s Bluesfest here in the Capital and I’d rather spend my time tearin’ it up there than driving to Canada’s Big Smoke. It is indeed a rare occasion for THAT occurrence!

In other news, if there’s one thing for sure about my journey from the fatness to the fitness, it’s that there’s a lot to think about. Sometimes it feels like the one thing I know for sure is that having a lap-band is going to get me to my goal this time and I will indeed be healthier within 12 months. And other times it feels like that’s the escapist fantasy of convicted food offender.

Sometimes this blog reflects that very sentiment but most times, I try to focus on the positive parts to keep me motivated. When that happens I mostly think about what my life will be like when I get to my goal. I keep hearing about all the wonderful things in store for me and all the endless possibilities for my future. So, I dare to dream more often than not. But it certainly is a challenge to keep my head in the clouds.

This is especially true when I accompany my aunt (henceforth referred to as The Wallet) on her shopping expeditions on an almost daily basis. Not only does the woman have a whopper of a wallet, she also wears a size 10. She’s not a trendster but she’s glamourous and fairly fashionable so I frequently envy her purchasing power. But I wouldn’t buy what she buys even if I could…she’s 58!

Although this is yet another example of how my London life has spoiled me, I dream of one day dropping my dough on my very own perfect pair of designer jeans. I can certainly find them here in a smaller size because Ottawa’s skinny shopping is pretty sweet. But I couldn’t find a fabulous pair of plus size jeans in this town if my life depended on it! Let alone something suitably glunge for me to kick it in da’ club.

boom boom jeansEven plus size retailers here in the Capital can’t believe I would ever disagree that their duds are just that. Some of them actually believe in the stereotype that plus size women want to hide their hides. I’m not a big chick that likes to regularly rock the bodycon (I’d certainly wear the sexiness pictured here though!) but I do like my clothes to cling to my curves and they just don’t do it in Canadian plus-size fashions. Seriously, if I could draw I’d design the best damn denim for babes with a booty this country’s ever seen.

In the meantime, I found a pair of skinny/straight leg jeans while with The Wallet at Winner’s this week. They’re from Boom Boom Jeans! and I just love them! They’re actually tight on my calves and they hug my bum just so. I love them so much I’m thinking I might get another pair! Gotta go back to Winner’s though cause I can’t get ’em anywhere else in Canada right now. Figures!

Finding My Way

So, I pondered my little predicament over the last couple of days and I really am truely tired of this city. At first I thought it might be simply my lack of employment and general purpose in this imperfect society or perhaps my inability to chew away the pain, but the more I think about living my life in this small town city, the more I realise that ultimately, it’s not what I want.

Even if by some stroke of good fortune I find myself in the job of my Ottawa dreams I’m not sure it will be enough. A lack of consistent income has meant a steady increase in my debt-load which, quite frankly, I’m already struggling to cart around. So, any money I might make certainly won’t be the solution to my sorrows.

I’ve already got my family here and I’ve got some lovely friends. It’s just that I’m so BORED I honestly don’t know what to do with myself. And my priorities are simply NOT the same as most of O-town’s residents. It’s a LOVELY city if you want to own a house or you’ve got a family and plan to raise kiddies. But as everyone knows, little Baby Mac’s are NOT in my future.

Consider me the Carrie of my friends only a little less promiscuous and considerably less fashionable (and currently Mr Big-less). Speaking of which, I saw SATC2 and despite the critics’ condemnation, I quite loved it. It was a pretty simple story and a lot of the attire was ridiculous at best but it was a fun film nonetheless. And it made me miss London. A lot.


I don’t want to go backwards so I’m not going back to The Big Smoke (unless I’m visiting) but I really gotta get the hells outta Dodge. Where’s a bad man with a horse and a big sack of bills when you need one?

Pop Goes The World

Saw SATC2 this weekend with my Auntie. Loved it but the clothes were simply stupid most of the time. There were a few really great giggles but the accessories certainly stole the show thanks to what I’m guessing is a pretty big chunk of the $10M wardrobe budget. Yes, the clothes were gorgeous but the bags were better and I’m not even gonna get into the shoes. But I’m fairly certain there won’t be a repeat performance from the oh-so-fabulous foursome.

sex and the city 2What really got me was this fashion fiasco (pictured).  Parts of these outfits are whimsically wearable but I just couldn’t do it. Even if I was skinny enough to squeeze into them!

I did enjoy a tasty treat during my entertaining evening: a Diet Coke. I haven’t had a sip of the sweet stuff since before my surgery. I didn’t drink much but I also didn’t suffer from my sips and combined it with a little popcorn.

Much to my delight there were no gas pains or any tummy trouble. I don’t think I’ll be sipping some again anytime soon just in case. But it was a nice surprise to not get sick.

That being said, like the SATC girls, I guess I’ll continue to test the boundaries of my lifestyle until someone pans my performance!

Freakum Dress

Cannes Film Festival - Rose McGowanOkay, I’m such a sucker for a beautiful ball gown! Check out this divine D&G vintage ball gown worn by one of my favourite witches Rose McGowan. She wore it back in 2008 to Cannes but it’s vintage and oh so timeless. I would most certainly say yes to this dress!!

My entire life I’ve never imagined myself in a designer dress. I’ve had to take the time to discern designers providing plus-sized options of their gorgeous gowns. There are far more plus-size vendors in Canada now than there ever were when I was a teen trying to choose my attire for the profusion of formal events in my educational career. But most have yet to include the edge that enables me to make an outfit my own. Most of the time, if I don’t buy what’s on the mannequin it’s pretty tough to fashion trendy togs from the outdated accoutrement on display in most big-girl shops.

Cannes Film Festival - Rose McGowan - Closeup

Having the band gives me hope about the shopping expeditions I’ll be able to SHARE with my friends and family in the future. And I wanna get married in a dress like one day. It’s absolutely perfect! The colours, the cut. It doesn’t get much better than that.

Who needs white to make me blend into the background. I mean, officially I’ve been out of the white dress category for more than half my life anyway. Now, for the perfect fella…

Cute is What We Aim For

A beautiful messBeen surfin’ around the ‘net this evenin’ and found myself a cutie pie site full of things for me to spend my food money on. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Red Velvet Art by Elsie Flannigan. There’s prints, clothes and some oh so kitch accessories. When fits, I shall be snapping up some of Elsie’s wonderful wares.

She’s also a Bloggie Award nominee and for very good reason. If you HEART art and design you’ll love what she’s got to say on A Beautiful Mess. She’s a Typepad blogger though so no nifty Blogger Buzz shortcuts. BUT she’s also a nominee for a Bloggie Award so she’s definitely worth a butchers.

Dream Big

Since I got back to Canada my priorities have changed. The lifestyle is dramatically different to the one I’ve become accustomed to. I’m no longer searching for the best bars or the most frequented restaurants or purchasing the latest fashion mags. Despite the fact that I’m currently ‘between contracts’ my top temptation is seeking advice on how to decorate my maison.  (Not to mention that I don’t actually own a property.)I do rent though. A great little two-bedroom that comes with all the trimmings.

I seem to be searching for a something to keep my coolness on the up. Since homes are so important on this side of the pond I guess I’m making sure those Joneses don’t get to far ahead of me while I wait for my next project…

Sarah Richardson - Hilltop Contemporary Living Room

I did some digging and did indeed find the most perfect living room I’ve ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on.

Designed by Sara Richardson (star of TV’s Design Inc.), this Hilltop Contemporary living room has the perfect balance of style and function. I absolutely love it! The rich purple is perfect, the subtle hints of pink are perfect, the gunmetal sofa is perfect. Did I mention it’s perfect?? But I don’t have a living room I can paint purple or an ambitious budget to purchase 5 chairs and a sofa.

So, this is my big dream for my own place. Perhaps my reward of all my hard work shedding the pounds. If I can afford this, I’ll most certainly lap those Joneses. But who really wants to be a Jones anyway? They’re probably broke by now and I already know what that feels like.

Junk in My Trunk

Weight Loss Help ScaleTo the people I know and love, I’m overweight. To just about everyone else in the Western world I’m a fat girl. When I’m shopping in a store that couldn’t possibly stock my size, I’m a fat girl. When I’m shopping for a bra in one of Canada’s largest (and I don’t mean cup size) lingerie retailers, I’m a fat girl. When a stranger sees me chowing down a cereal bar in public, I’m a fat girl. When I’m eating right, working out, and actually losing some of the junk in my trunk, I’m a fat girl.

It doesn’t matter that I’m shopping in the skinny store for some stylish accessories or a fashionable gift for a friend. Or that there’s only a handful of lingerie stores in the country with holders to support my boulders. Or that I’m devouring said cereal bar in an effort to recover from my 3 times per week 2-hour torture session with my hot shot celebrity trainer. I’m still a fat girl.

But I’ve never been one to let my physical fitness level stop me from climbing to the top of the social ladder. Or hate myself for my big body’s imperfections. Quite the opposite really. I’ve always maintained a large social circle and my youth was lightly peppered with my fair share of beautiful boys despite my size. Perhaps it’s because I’ve always had a larger than life personality to complement my curvy configuration. Or perhaps it’s been the oh-so-pretty face I’ve been hearing about all my life.

I’m not entirely sure what it’s been because my “pretty face” never stopped the old ladies from sending a scoff in my direction whilst squeezing into the seat beside me. My “pretty face” never made it any easier for the crabby carnie to squeeze my sizeable derriere into the seats on the Behemoth. My “pretty face” never stopped the kids from mooing at me on the Underground. It seems my sizeable appearance has always bothered everyone else but me.

That being said, not a day goes by that I don’t feel a scratch from the green monster at the thought of my smaller sidekicks and their frequent shopping expeditions through NYC and LDN. Oh, what I’d give to visit a city and pound the pavement with my girls without having to investigate the whereabouts of the most conveniently located big girls boutique. Hmph.

So, where am I going with this? Well, after spending the better part of two decades living the larger life I’ve decided to do something drastic. On April 16th, 2010 I’m having weight-loss surgery at the Slimband clinic in downtown Toronto and I can’t wait!

Friday marks Day 1 of the Pre-Op diet. It’s super strict! It’s designed to defeat my addiction to the bad stuff and help me take my portion sizes from super size to mini meals in preparation for the big day.

Black & Blue

I recently caught up with a friend that I hadn’t seen in nearly 10 years. She’s from Winnipeg originally and I always considered her more fashion forward than cool conservative so among other things, I was curious how she was handling life in our nation’s capital. Despite some beautiful little boutiques, a Holt Renfrew and the recent addition of some big names (Michael Kors, Coach, BCBG etc), Ottawa is by far one of Canada’s most fashion cautious cities.

My friend delighted in my dismay and promptly provided a top tip for surviving Ottawa’s fashion wasteland: get a black coat and a blue coat. I considered this piece of  advice whilst mentally checking my clothing inventory and came to the shocking realization that I didn’t own either. Hmph. Well, they’re just so…restrained.

I’m no fashion maverick by any means but I do keep an eye on the latest trends. I’ve always mixed classic with trendy and erred on the side of caution by London standards but in Ottawa, I’m an outright radical. Let’s hope I can find a few jackets that tickle my fashion fancy yet satisfy the status quo….I’m quite keen on the Eden-L jacket in the F/W 2009 collection from our friends at Mackage.

Alas, now that it’s officially spring, I’m thinking the perfect pink might just add a little pizzaz to Canada’s conservative capital. Giambattista Valli has a juicy pink cotton and silk-blend jacket I’m absolutely loving. Too bad it’s out of my price rang at a whopping $1,836 USD!

Falling For You

So, there’s a lot of drama in my life. As with most women in their thirties it largely involves my family. In the past few months my dear grandmother has begun to show signs of her true calling – that of a wilting flower that quite frequently requires the use of a fainting couch. I question whether the old lady hasn’t recently been reminded of her younger years by a Mad Men marathon. I can’t be sure but I’m fairly certain that wilting, she is not.

Fainting couch - Amy Neunsinger

When I spotted Amy Neunsinger’s image (above), certainly caught my attention. It’s as if she captured the very moment this exhausted house wife of a busy man was overcome by the latest melodrama only to find herself serendipitously strewn across the most appropriate perches.

Somehow this blonde bombshell manages to look exquisite throughout the whole ordeal. Methinks she may protest a tad too much. As does my little old granny.

As I’ve recently found myself furniture shopping for a beautiful apartment I don’t yet own, it has come to my attention that these pieces of cultural and aesthetic antiquity have become quite trendy. They’re ever so chic when styled appropriately and they’re actually quite comfortable. But they cost a pretty penny.

Oh, how I long for the days when I could wilt so shamelessly as to make a more modern version of this stunning 60’s fixture a worthwhile expenditure for my future domicile.

A Shopping Story

LOVE this article by Lisa Grant from the Guardian.

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